Me + Growing Up = Not Until I Say So! (Part 2)
by Krystal Mays
We all have arguments with our friends. Whether it's a dispute over the newest fashion trends or a disagreement over where the two of you were supposed to go this weekend, we all have those moments that make our friendship stronger. But what do you do when you and your best friend get into a heated argument? One that ends with the words, "Just grow up!" This is when it occurred to me that my plan was taking a turn for the worst. Not only do I not know what my future holds, but I also can't have fun anymore! I have faced the undesirable truth! I have to grow up…but not until I say so!
Everyday it seems as if the news gets worse. Turn on the television and what do I see? Richard Simmons newest weight loss program, the best energy boosters to buy, and the best areas of my face to shoot Botox in. It's a never-ending reminder of how bad the aging process gets! But the best has got to be the show, "Extreme Makeovers." These people go from drop dead ugly to drop dead gorgeous in less than ten weeks! A few tucks here, a lift or two there, and a lot of pain later, you can look like a super star! The ultimate secret has been unleashed! All I have to do is wait until I'm about 55 to stop the aging process! Who cares about the Fountain of Youth? It's not like she was much help anyway considering all she wanted to do was hide from us!
It's the days when you think you've got it all figured out that something is bound to go wrong. What description sounds better? A successful paid lawyer who graduated from Harvard or a ditzy waitress who bases most of her income on the tips she receives from rude customers? Personally, I'd go for option three. A successful student whose reason for going to college is to figure out her path while exploring new ideas and having some fun. But NO! Option 3 is not good enough! Jobs and school only cause more chaos in life as you get older. You've got to have some idea of what you want to do beginning in Kindergarten so that by the age of 18 you'll be successfully enrolled in Yale University and soon to graduate with a 5.0 GPA! Do some people really believe that we can be programmed when we're little? Imagine this interview with a five-year-old kindergartner:
Interviewer: "So Bobby, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
Bobby: "Oh, I would like to invest my time in many areas of study."
Interviewer: "Do you mean you would like to be a police officer or a fireman?"
Bobby: "No sir. I prefer to look into the areas of a entrepreneur, psychoanalyst, or neurologist."
Interviewer: "Do you even know what a neurologist does Bobby?"
Bobby: "I would think I do considering I'm the one with the brain here."
"Mucho dinero" also seems to pose a problem with this idea of growing up. College+job=money or good looks + brains=money. Interesting concept don't you think? Money helps buy the good looks, but the job has to come first to make the money. College has to come before the money to get you the job and soon enough you're broke because you spent so many years in school! Who said growing up was fun? At the rate I'm going, I'll be living with mom and dad for another 5 years, still have no money, and still be in school! Shouldn't someone have made a manual to go by? Go here, do this, make some money, wake up, and go through the process all over again!
Last, but surely not least, MEN are a huge problem when it comes to growing up. Ladies, did you know we have to deal with them as we get older too? Just when I thought dealing with the middle school crushes was bad enough, I discovered that I have to take all that "dating stuff" seriously now. Whatever happened to the idea of me, my cat, and our two-door shack? All of a sudden I must deal with these despicable critters that only get meaner, madder, and more demanding as I get older! Not to mention they only cause us women more pain, and I'm not just talking about heartache. It goes beyond that. Yes ladies, I'm talking about babies! Okay, different story for a different paper. Yep-growing up causes more than one kind of pain!
No matter how many times I hear the words, "Just grow up!" I know that I will continue to let them slide through one ear and out the other. I may not want to admit it, but yes, I have discovered that I have to grow up. My days of living in Never Never Land will not last forever, and I can't continue to allow Peter Pan to tell me anymore lies. I might not be able to stop the aging process, but I will definitely put up a fight whenever it gets in my way. Like I've said before, I might have to grow up, but I won't do it until I say so!
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