Flying, Falling
By Joshua Boyce
His Daddy...
A man he never knew.
A fleeting shadow in his life,
A vague half-truth.
The fact he knew,
The truth he felt
His Dad loved with fists
feet, sticks, and belts.
"I love you."
These words a fantasy.
Never was he chastised,
He was beaten 'til insanity...
It seemed a sweet release
...insanity.
The escape from a rabid reality,
from vanity...
From vexation, from pain,
from hate, from 'love'.
To leave the life he knew,
To embrace the sky above...
He must first taste...
The grass below.
Strike the match
And watch it mellow...
Watch it decay
And fade into gray...
But not before he lights
The night to sunny day.
Inhale, exhale
Breathe in, breathe out.
He tastes the night sky,
And drifts among the clouds.
And then...
The falling...
Ever quickly to the ground
The falling!
He struggles!
He must maintain it!
The high is failing!
How must he attain it!
And then...
What is this, this fragrance!
Intoxicating, a sandy beach
He sets to his nose to taste it.
And heaven is his home
Once more...
A weightless swim,
A flight, yes, one more.
Ever higher!
Ever further!
Yet, if he falls
He'd fall forever!
A tear for his fate,
Another day while he's sane.
A tear for this day,
for the nights, for the pain.
Rock bottom...
No where left but up.
And all of it coagulates
In his little steel cup.
Maybe now he'll leave
The world behind,
And travel
Through the sky.
One little pin prick,
One more hurt.
No more being sick
Of trying to make it work.
Goodbye, Daddy
It's time for me to go.
My flight's about to leave,
My blood is runnin' slow.
I wish I'd found love
I didn't have to smoke.
I wish I'd found love
I didn't have to choke.
I wish I'd found love
I didn't have to sniff.
I wish I'd found love
I didn't have to stick.
I wish I'd found love
In my Daddy's eyes.
Before he saw me lying
Beneath the high...
Beneath the sky....
Beneath the sheet...
Goodbye...