Beware of Dog
By Zeb Stenman
Dear Mister Burglar,
I have claimed these humans and their home as my own.
I will fight to the last to protect them
Even though they sometimes act funny,
And do odd things.
Don't think that I'll be a pushover
Just because I'm willing to die.
I'm just as willing to kill.
I could use a new ball,
And your head will do nicely.
If I can't reach your head, I'll use your arm as a chew toy.
It may not squeak, but you will.
If that's still too high, I'll take your leg.
It looks juicier than kibbles.
I don't even need the whole leg ... the foot's the best part;
I'll worry it off at the ankle.
So go ahead and try to break in.
Not only am I a warrior, but I'll call for back-up,
And my human will come, armed to the teeth.
Signed, the Dog.
P.S. If this makes you pee your pants, do it outside;
I don't want to be blamed for your mess.
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